Rule No. 22: CONTROL YOUR THINKING
Positive thinking controls a positive result. Once your mind believes it, it becomes a reality.
Hello, Dear Reader,
Welcome back to another week in The Playbook—Rules for Life. It feels good to be back with you, continuing in our journey together. I can’t believe we’re in the final week of October, and soon we’ll be at Thanksgiving. But alas, time really waits for no one.
I hope your last week was a good one and this one is already off to a great start in Jesus’ name. I know mine so far has been good. Today being Monday, I got some things I needed to do done, and took further steps toward the goals I had set at the beginning of the year. Though it’s been almost eleven months, I can say that God’s timing has really been something to marvel at.
In the last week, conversations with a friend of mine who, alongside her husband, has taken over the “older sibling” role in my life have been so rewarding. As the eldest child for my biological mother, and growing up an only child with Debbie, it’s refreshing to be a younger sibling, able to ask questions and learn.
So yes, big shoutout to my older sister in spirit, E.D. Her conversations have reminded me how much of a role our mind plays in determining the outcomes that we get. What we think about the most is what we march towards and become.
Every thought builds a bridge —either toward peace or further from it.
If last week’s rule was the cement in our foundation, think of this week’s rule as the aggregate needed to mix it, before we add our water (next week’s rule).
But before I get ahead of myself, this week’s rule is: Control Your Thinking.
The Challenge
In our society, we’re constantly bombarded with different messages. Our feeds show us so much information—from gossip to the news, to the feel-good pieces, to even the bits of humor we cling to just to make it through our day. You probably know this, but slowly, everything we watch, listen to, or talk about eventually becomes the bulk of what we think about if we’re not doing so already.
From a media perspective, the information bubbles we exist in control our thought patterns, our topics of conversation, and eventually our beliefs.
Our feeds are representatives of what we believe. Our conversations are emblematic of what we think. And our circles reflect the core tenets of who we are.
I often wonder how aware we are of what we are actually thinking on a daily basis.
According to a Healthline article, we have about 6,000 thoughts per day, ranging from everyday musings to deeper cogitations. That’s about 6.5 thought transitions each minute.
With so many thoughts racing through our minds, it’s no wonder we sometimes struggle to make sense of our feelings or even find ourselves indecisive on smaller matters, especially in a post-COVID world where we each spend a significant amount of time in our own thoughts. But my question is: how many of those deeper cogitations are positive instead of negative?
Look at everything happening in our world today—I can understand and empathize with anyone who finds that their outlook is more negative than positive. It’s hard for it to be positive.
We also live in an age where the term toxic positivity exists. But what’s wrong with always seeing the glass half full instead of half empty?
The Reflection
The truth is, there’s a difference between pretending everything is okay and believing everything can be redeemed.
Toxic positivity tells us to ignore pain.
True positive thinking, the kind rooted in faith, acknowledges pain but refuses to let it be the final word, especially when you’re believing in the One who is the Author and Finisher.
When Paul says in Philippians 4:8,
“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely… think on these things,”
he’s not calling us to blind optimism. He’s calling us to disciplined thinking.
It’s an instruction to take captive the thoughts that spiral, to redirect our mental energy toward what builds, not what breaks.
And trust me, I know it’s not easy! I shared last week about the mental rut I was stuck in, where even my positivity and hope seemed to be running out.
Wholeness isn’t the absence of cracks — it’s light shining through where healing began.
But I look back now at what my thoughts were saying to me then—the way my thinking forced me to isolate, block out loved ones, and even accept false narratives I told myself.
That’s the biggest part of this: controlling your thinking, because the Bible says in Proverbs 23:7, “As a man thinks, so he is.”
It takes training—daily, deliberate work. The same way we train our bodies, we must train our minds. I’ve spent an exorbitant amount of time in the gym this year, but also the same amount of time challenging my thinking and choosing to believe what God says about me.
When the negative thought comes:
“I’ll never get there.” I’ve learned to replace it with: “I’m on my way.”
When doubt screams:
“You’ve failed too many times. Look how long it’s taking.” I remind myself:
“I’ve learned too many lessons to quit now. I’m on track.”
And when fear whispers:
“You’re not enough,” I answer with truth: “Christ in me is more than enough.”
The reality is that our thoughts are seeds, and whatever we water grows. So if you water bitterness, frustration, envy, or defeat, don’t be surprised when your days feel heavy, when life feels like you’re running in a never-ending race. But if you water gratitude, faith, expectancy, and peace, watch how your garden changes.
The Practice
Here’s a small exercise that’s helped me:
Every morning, before checking my phone, I start with my daily devotion. Finding myself in God’s Word allows me to set the tone for my day, since there’s nothing more true, noble, or pure than that.
I think about the things God has already set in motion, and in my prayers, I thank Him for continuing His good work. Not things I’m hoping for, but things I believe are happening even if I can’t see them yet. That’s how faith operates. It activates what’s unseen through what’s thought and spoken.
As Hebrews 11:1 reminds us: “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for, and assurance about what we do not see.”
You’ll be surprised to see that what begins as a mental rehearsal of belief often becomes the very reality you walk into. So control your thinking, because your mind is the command center of your destiny.
If your thoughts are wild, your faith will be scattered. When you’re thinking about too much at once, how can you focus on one thing? Just as our eyes can only focus on one image at a time, our mind’s eye works the same way. But when your thoughts are anchored in truth, your spirit finds calm, even in chaos. And we’ve become conditioned to accept living in chaos when God created order from it.
The enemy doesn’t need to destroy your life if he can first distract your mind. A distracted person is disarmed, and a disarmed person is unable to put up any fight.
That’s why we’re told in Romans 12:2,
“Do not conform to pattern of this world, but Be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Transformation begins in thought before it ever manifests in action. I’ve always known it, but this year, I’ve really been called to live it out.
So as we step into this week, take note of what you’re feeding your mind. Curate your thoughts like a playlist. Guard your peace like it’s treasure, because it is.
This Week’s Reflection
I want to challenge you to take an inventory of your thoughts. Notice all the patterns, and even write them down.
What’s the first thing on your mind when you wake up?
What do you fall asleep replaying?
What do you allow to live rent-free in your mind that doesn’t serve your peace, remind you of your promise, or direct your purpose?
Then, little by little, start to redirect yourself. Speak life over your situation, because life and death are in the power of the tongue.
Choose faith over fear.
Replace complaints with gratitude.
Trade pressure for promise.
And when those old thoughts try to sneak back in—because let’s face it, they definitely will—remind yourself: “I have the power to control my thinking, and my thinking will not control me.”
You can’t always control what happens to you, but you can always control how you think about it.
You were never created to be a prisoner of your mind. You were called to be the steward of it. So renew your mind daily. Guard your joy fiercely.
And let your thoughts reflect the truth that the same God who began a good work in you is still completing it.
Once your mind believes it, your life starts moving toward it. Control your thinking, because when your mind is aligned with heaven, everything else in your life begins to follow.
So I ask: “Where will your thoughts lead you?”
